by Cheryl DePaolo
'Twas the night before Christmas,
and all through the club,
all the webbies were working to get rid of their chub.
The videos were stacked by the TV with care,
in hopes that they’d get some new exercise wear.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
last year I stole sugar plums right out of their heads!
This Mom had finally looked down at her lap
and decided she’d stop this overeating crap.
And when in the chatroom arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the boards to see what was the matter.
Away to the chatroom I flew like a flash,
and typed in my name with a flair of panache
The moon on the breast of the turkey I’m thawing
had given me visions of fairly soon gnawing,
But, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
but Richard himself and the dogs he holds dear.
You know that our Richard is lively and quick
and he doesn’t indulge in one candy cane stick.
More rapid than eagles, his webbies they came,
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
"Now Buffy! Now Dancer!
Now, Audra, come prance!
On, Sarah! On, Teena!
We are going to dance!
From the left to the right!
And take it back to the wall!
Now sweat away! Sweat away!
Sweat away all!"
From his head to his toes he appeared to be wet,
and his clothes were all stinky with buckets of sweat
A bundle of food he had flung on his back,
and all of the veggies peeked out of his pack.
His eyes--how they twinkled! His legs how they shine!
(I’ve got to remember to spray Pam on mine!)
His cute little mouth was ready for mirth
and he had plans to call folks all over the earth.
The cords used for toning were held in his hands,
and he looked to make sure that we all had these bands.
He had no broad face, nor a little round belly,
that shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
He's not chubby or plump, but he sure is an elf,
and I smile when I see him, in spite of myself.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his pen,
and checked all our foodsheets again and again.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
he couldn’t believe all the foods that we chose.
He sprang to his feet, to his dogs gave a shout,
And away they all boogied on their way out.
But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he danced out of here,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a thin year!"
by Cheryl DePaolo
A salad is a thing of beauty;
How did I fail to see
The wonder of the salad bowl
That sat in front of me?
The riot of it's colors
All jumbled in their nest
A rainbow of God’s promise
To feed us all the best
Greens of every hue
Some frilly and some smooth
Gently hold my treasures
And are the best of food
Peppers red and green and gold
Are confetti fit to eat
Mixed among bright carrots
So whimsical and sweet
Tomatoes of the brightest red
Tossed about the bowl
The blackness of the olives
Whose virtues I extoll
So many other veggies
I could go on and on
In praise of my nice salad
Which now, alas, is gone!
By Cheryl DePaolo
Inside this jail
Of my own making
Surrounded by all this me
How can I break free?
to jump and dance and run
So long ago
A young girl flew
Graceful as a butterfly
Flitting from tree to tree
How did I lose me?
Reverse cocoon
Trapped in this snare
As if my wings were pinned
The music so faint
All dancing ceased
I hear the beat
Feet start to move
I breathe in, close my eyes
I raise my arms
And I begin to break free
by Cheryl DePaolo
Standing on the scale
With one foot in the air,
With one eye tight shut,
And completely bare,
I should face the scale
Expecting some pleasure,
But my heart’s full of dread;
I know I didn’t measure.
I eyeballed the portions-
My eyeballs grew bigger!
If the portions were large,
Maybe so is my figure.
My teaspoons were heaping,
My tablespoons too,
That is, when I used them,
And those times were few.
Four ounces of meat
I took from the platter;
Um, I think it was four,
Does it really matter?
That slice from the cake
I shouldn’t have nabbed,
The spoons that I licked,
The popcorn I grabbed,
The dressing I poured
all over my salad plate,
May have contributed
To this gain of weight.
I guess I should measure,
Do my guesses come close?
If I did this with medicine
I might overdose!
if you are a little different
along on your adventures
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